TTC: I want to share with you a breathing tool you can use to soften your heart as you grieve.

Learning how to breathe out and become mindful helps you release sadness and grief from the body as you ttc. More than anything the breath makes you present. It brings you into the here and now, the only thing you have control over. Often when you grieve you feel out of control it can be overwhelming and consuming. When you consciously focus on the breath it helps to slow down the whole system. If you can, make it super gentle and slow. You may notice that your shoulders drop, your chest starts to become still and your forehead relaxes.  Over the years I’ve had women say to me that they don’t think they have ever really learnt how to breathe properly. Practising this long exhale breath from the belly has not only changes how you feel but it also gives you a powerful tool to be able to release grief and sadness from the body as you travel your road to becoming a mother.

When you  soften your heart and take time out to process what you’ve been through you are able to come out the other side stronger and wiser. Sitting with grief, breathing into it and allowing each exhale to release the sadness, creates space in the body so that you are able to gently move forward towards recovery.

If you can relate to what I am saying see if you can tune in and soften. Try this heart breathing practice with me:

  • Place your hands on top of one another – right hand on top, left underneath.
  • Place the bottom hand on your heart and feel the flesh of your chest under your palm and fingers.
  • Put a gentle downward pressure through your palms and feel the skin, flesh and bone of the rib cage underneath your hands.
  • Keep pressing gently down and close your eyes.
  • See if you can feel the beat of your heart underneath your palms.
  • Feel this downward pressure grounding you and now lift up through your spine and feel yourself grow taller because of the pressure rooting you down.
  • Inhale 2 counts, exhale 4 counts through the nose, releasing and softening with each out breath. Do this 5 times.
  • Then say to yourself as you inhale ‘I am loving and kind’.
  • As you exhale say ‘I release and let go’ – make the ‘o’ of the word ‘go’ long and smooth and take it to the end of your breath ‘goooo’.
  • Visualise sadness, tenderness, fear, anxiety leaving the body as you breathe out. Do this 5 times.
  • Open your eyes, release your hands to your lap and notice how you feel.